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I don’t know about you, but I thoroughly enjoy anything that triggers perspective shifts and peels away the surface layers of who I think I am. Although yoga and meditation is the primary tool I like to use for increasing self-awareness, I think it’s fun to occasionally go down other rabbit holes. One of these rabbit holes that I am particularly susceptible to is personality tests. Yup. I am a sucker for those quizzes that identify which “type” you are, and it’s not because I want to fit into a box. Actually what I discover often when I take these quizzes is that I tend to be the least common type or the one that only like 10% of people fit into. (Do they just say that to everyone to make them feel special?)
Usually, though, my first reaction to this discovery, is “but WHY? Why can’t I just be normal? Why can’t I just fit in? Everything would be easier if I was just like others." Maybe I do actually want to fit into a box! 😱
Observing this reoccurring reaction to being told I’m not that “normal” (Even though it’s just a silly test saying this), is one of the reasons these quizzes have always led me to some deep truths about myself. Once I arrive at these truths, it is from there that I can begin to shift the perspectives I have created about who I am. This is when I begin to probe deeper and ask myself, but why is it so terrible to be different? What’s the worst that could happen if I embrace this uniqueness? How can I make this individuality work for me instead of against me?
Once I stop fighting against the belief that things would be easier if I were like everyone else I can often find a deep appreciation for those unique qualities. And although I try not to latch on too much to what a quiz says about me, having the awareness of possessing certain qualities makes me eager to explore if this knowledge can somehow positively affect my well-being.
So below I want to share with you 7 fascinating quizzes that have led to some exciting mindset changes for me personally. I hope they will shift some things inside for you as well.
1. Our Six Human Needs
This is a concept developed by one of the world’s leading life and personal development coaches, Tony Robbins. He suggests that no matter where we come from, all of our needs can be categorized into 6 basic needs. We all strive to meet these needs but sometimes we have a negative way to get our needs met rather than a positive and sustainable way. Out of these 6 needs, we also each have a dominant one that tends to drive most of what we do in life. This drive is so strong that according to Tony, people will even give up their dreams, values and goals to meet this need!
The 6 needs are certainty, variety, love, significance, growth, and contribution.
As a side note, my personal dominant need is growth! I didn’t need to take the quiz to find that out because I know for a fact that if I feel stuck and not able to move forward, I throw the BIGGEST adult temper tantrum on the planet. There is literally nothing I hate more than staying in the same place.
By the way, Tony also says that when something meets 3 or more of these needs, it becomes an addiction. (That certainly explains why tango dancing feels like such an addiction! I think it meets all 6 of these needs! If you’re one of my tango dancing friends, would you agree?)
I found this topic so useful in understanding my inner world that I've created a whole yoga series inspired by our human needs, inside my membership. Below you can try a 30-minute yin yoga class from this series for free. The full series will be available inside my membership on December 1, 2020.
2. Sixteen Personality Types
This way of categorizing human behavior stems from more classic approaches such as Jungian personality type casting or the Myers-Briggs theory. However, it is grounded in more contemporary psychological research. What you will discover is how you interact with your surroundings, how you see the world and process information, how you make decisions and cope with emotions, and your approach to work, planning, and decision-making. Finally, the last part will show you how confident you are in your abilities and decisions.
This approach is much more complex than what I have outlined here so take the quiz to find out your personality type and learn more. Personally, I am the mediator type. Yet another type that according to the description “makes up such a small portion of the world’s population.” High five if you’re a mediator too!
3. Four Tendencies Quiz
In this quiz, developed by Gretchen Rueben, author of the book “The Four Tendencies,” you will gain valuable insight into how you respond to expectations. This includes both outer expectations such as meeting work deadlines and inner expectations such as keeping a New Year’s resolution. You will find out whether you are an Upholder, Questioner, Obliger, or Rebel.
Knowing yours and other people’s tendencies can create empathy and opportunity for creating more effective strategies for working together. Take the quiz here.
Personally, I am an Upholder… once again, one of the more rare types. *SIGH* It sounds so much cooler to be a rebel.
4. Five Love Languages
If you’ve ever wondered why you and your partner seem to be so different when it comes to expressing and receiving love, this quiz is for you! Does your partner show their love by cooking you dinner? Then they probably feel most loved when you engage in some kind of act of service. Do you feel most loved when your partner spends quality time with you? Then you’re probably expecting your partner to show you they love you by doing this too. We all have a different way of expressing love. Learning your love language, and your partners can significantly improve your relationships.
Personally, I’m all about the words of affirmation. As basic as it sounds, the way to my heart is simply to tell me you love me and that I’m beautiful! One of the many pros of dating in Argentina that I’ve found is that it comes quite naturally to most men to call you “hermosa” or “divina” or “Princesa” all the time. Ok, I know some of you think that's cheesy, but it gets me every time! Although, I have gone out with Argentines who don’t say this and then I get a bit entitled and think “Excuse me... where is my "hermosa"? "Bella"? Nothing???? Don’t you love me!!!!???? I live in Argentina for a reason!!!!” 😅😅😅
Take the quiz to find out whether your top love language is quality time, acts of service, words of affirmation, gift-giving, or physical touch.
5. Erotic Blueprint
Continuing on the topic of relationships, this fun quiz is all about what turns you on! Are you the type that needs everything in your environment to feel perfect in order to relax and enjoy a bit of intimacy, or are you more of a drop-your-pants and get-right-to-it kind of person?
Knowing what type you and your partner are can help you understand each other’s sexual needs and bring insight and experimentation to your relationship.
Take the quiz to find out if your dominant type is sensual, energetic, sexual, kinky, or shapeshifter.
Funny side note, when I first learned about this quiz I found it so fascinating that I shared it with a few friends at a party I was at. What ensued was that all 10 or 12 people in the room ended up taking the quiz and comparing answers! It was certainly a lively discussion for the rest of the evening!
6. Attachment Style
Okay, one more quiz that relates to relationships. Attachment style is a widely acknowledged psychological theory that is all about how we bond! Many modern couples therapy methods are based on this concept.
Attachment style is the idea that how we experienced our very first bond (usually with our mother) is how we bond in our romantic relationships. If your mother was emotionally present and responded to your needs consistently in your early years then you most likely developed a secure attachment style. If your mother was inconsistent in how she responded to your emotional needs, or overbearing, you likely developed an anxious attachment style. Lastly, if your mother was not emotionally present you may have developed an avoidant attachment style. Of course, it is possible to have a mix of these or a dominant and secondary style.
By the way, if you are not the secure type, just note that it is possible to learn secure attachment, so don’t despair! Also, don’t go blaming your mother for all your break-ups! Sometimes she may have been inconsistent because she was trying to keep all 3 or 4 of her kids happy!
Take the quiz to find out what your attachment style is and see if it brings you some positive changes to your relationship approach.
7. Is Your Leading Energy Masculine or Feminine
Lastly, I’ll end with another quiz from Tony Robbins. Regardless of your gender, we all possess qualities that are considered either masculine or feminine in their essence. In this quiz, you will discover how your leading energy reflects your nature and values and what effect this has on your experiences. Understanding your leading energy can help you to live more authentically in all aspects of your life.
Take the quiz to find out whether your leading energy is masculine or feminine. By the way, it’s not as simple as saying you are a man so you have dominant masculine energy or you are a woman so you have dominant feminine energy. Personally, according to this quiz, my dominant energy is masculine, so there you have it!
Okay, have fun with these quizzes and try not to take it all word for word. Just like with yoga and meditation, think of these quizzes as a tool towards gaining greater self-awareness and fulfillment.
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